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<title>a polaroid; but so much more. by gaybutokay</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25048957">a polaroid; but so much more.</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/gaybutokay/pseuds/gaybutokay'>gaybutokay</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Mystic Messenger (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Car Accidents, M/M, Sad, Sad Ending, Sadness, Soul-Crushing, just so sad bruh, kinda from the pov of jumin, zen is dead lol</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 10:35:42</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>769</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25048957</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/gaybutokay/pseuds/gaybutokay</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>jumin only had this left.<br/>if only things were different.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Han Jumin/Zen | Ryu Hyun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>43</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>a polaroid; but so much more.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>for the yoosung to my seven, the nao to my reko,,, i love u a lot bby<br/>v sad oops</p>
<p>she gave me a one word prompt of "polaroid" so here</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>a polaroid.</p>
<p>it was all he had left.</p>
<p>after three years of dating zen in secret, all jumin had left to remember him by was a simple polaroid of him.</p>
<p>it wasn’t even anything special- it was just a picture of him at a show, a smile plastered across his sweaty, yet doll-like face.  his red eyes weren’t looking at the camera, but instead they were looking into the audience.  jumin knew just from the stage, the costume, and the smile that zen had across his face that zen was staring at him.</p>
<p>zen’s smile when he stared at jumin was always gentle, though it changed slightly when zen took the stage.  when zen got his confidence that came along with standing on a stage and singing, dancing, acting, and most importantly, modeling, for the public, it really changed his aura and his vibes all around.  he felt as if there was nothing that was just like the confidence level from having a good night, and this was one of his best.  one of his hardest roles in one of his most important shows, yet he still somehow managed to have a completely flawless night.  it was all due to the help from jumin in memorizing his lines, and sometimes even using jumin as a dancing partner, though jumin had no clue what was happening half of the time.  he just left zen practice on him, mainly because he knew that the actor would throw a fit if he didn’t get to practice correctly, and that was not something that jumin had the patience to deal with.</p>
<p>zen’s smile beamed a radiant, confident energy, which rubbed off on everyone that saw him.  it was part of the reason he was so popular; watching him made people feel good.  it highlighted the joy of humanity, something that is all too rare these days, and he was so good at making everyone feel happy.  the smiles that he would give his fans seemed genuine, as they were, and it made the fans think that they meant something to their idol.  it was a dream come true for zen, and he knew that it was all thanks to his fans.</p>
<p>jumin was hesitant about zen at first, not trusting his demeanor that screamed ‘i am the best!!!  i am so amazing!!!’.  jumin always thought that he himself was the best, but simultaneously had doubts.  it was a strange existence, one that zen didn’t seem to share.  zen’s narcissism drove jumin insane until the pair was forced to spend time together, as zen had hurt himself during one of his shows and needed somewhere to stay, and it started to cause the men to grow closer to one another.  </p>
<p>they never admitted to anyone else that they’d fallen in love, not even the other members of the rfa.  they kept that a secret, as they never wanted to expose the truth of their sexualities to the world.  zen and jumin were both bisexual, zen leaning towards women, and jumin having no preference.  jumin simply loved whoever treated him with respect and kindness, and he got more than enough of that from zen behind closed doors.  when they were together in private, jumin was able to get his share of affection, both physical and emotional.  they seemed to work well together.</p>
<p>but in all their time together, zen never wanted to take pictures of them.  though he loved pictures, he know damn well that too many pictures together would start a bunch of rumors, and that is the exact opposite of what they needed.  one of the most influential businessmen in the entire world with one of the most famous actors?  word would spread quick, and jumin would lose business.  it wasn’t exactly easy to be homosexual in the working world, and he knew it.</p>
<p>jumin began regretting the lack of photos.  he needed a reminder more than this still polaroid of the love that he and zen once shared.</p>
<p>after all, it wasn’t like he was able to take pictures now that they weren’t able to share those moments now that he was gone.</p>
<p>a fatal crash… that’s all it took?  just a car to hit his, and just like that?</p>
<p>that was painful.</p>
<p>but, as he reminisced on the feeling of zen’s soft skin against his own… he realized that this polaroid, while being all he had left, was the most important thing to him.</p>
<p>it was all he had left of zen.</p>
<p>and those vague memories of how it felt to be by his side.</p>
<p>a polaroid; yet so much more.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>thanks for reading!<br/>ily</p></blockquote></div></div>
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